Friday, August 10, 2012

Sizzle-Sizzle!


Friday is here.  And along with it, probably the hottest day of the summer so far.  It was 111 yesterday, and is supposed to be hotter today.
Noah and Hannah are adjusting to Kindergarten.  And since I watch Noah while Erika works, I am adjusting to the new schedule too.  I thought I would get all sorts of cleaning done this first week, but no sir!  Not a bit!  It is too hot to clean.
The white board that is on the door as you come into the house from the garage says it all.  The only thing to do in this heat is swim.  I do a lot of that.  I have been in several times already today.
I just got out and made myself a big tuna sandwich!  I haven't made one in  a long time.   I pulled up some fresh green onions, and a tomato off the vine, and voila....delicious!!!  I threw a little sweet pickle and some celery in there too.  So good!!!

It has been a  pretty emotional week here.  The kiddos going to school.  Starting in their first organized sports teams as well.  They are growing up way too fast.  And it is making me reflect on the times when our three children were little and doing all of these things.   I don't share a lot of personal news here on my blog, but those of you who know me and have been around a while, know that we have three grown kids, and they all have their own lives.  And we are blessed to have them all right here in town.  And we get to be part of their every day lives.   My family is close.  And this is THE most important thing in my life.  Family.   Last week, my son told us that he is moving to Nashville on September 1st.  We were shocked.  And yet, we weren't.  Drew is an aspiring musician.  He is crazy talented.  He has been trying to pursue his dream of music for a few years now.  He is a music teacher, and says that while he does enjoy that, it isn't what he wants to do with his gift.   I get that.  I get that he feels the desire to be in a culture where there are other musicians doing what he is trying to do.  Where he can find the people who can perhaps help him find his way to where he wants to be. 
On the one hand, he has a lot of courage to do this.  He is going with his guitar, a suitcase full of clothes, and a few hundred dollars.  No job, no place to stay, no family, no girlfriend by his side.   But to us, he is ill prepared for such an adventure.  I think it was the great Coach Wooden who said....."Failure to Prepare, is preparing to Fail!"   And yet....and yet....and yet.....he is my baby boy.  He is a grown man, but he will always be my boy, my son, my heart.  Just like all of our kids are.  It doesn't matter that they have grown up.  A parents love and desire to protect, will never change, regardless of their age.   My heart has been heavy with worry, and sad, and all of those things.  I have cried buckets.  Yesterday, he was here, and I had to go outside I was crying so much after talking to his girlfriend.  He came out to find me to say goodbye, and when he found me and could see that I had been crying, he didn't know what to do.   He hugged me, and I think I spit something stupid out, like "I don't want you to go" and he just hugged me and left.  I was supposed to go to a ladies luncheon/spa day yesterday, but no amount of makeup was going to make my face look presentable to go.  I called my friend to apologize for not coming, and she called me later that night, at about 8 or so, and said, "hey, come over, there are only a few of us now and we are sitting by the pool, munching and having some nice Chardonnay."  I decided to go, and it did me good.  We talked, we laughed, we cried, we ate, we splashed in the pool, and 3 hours later when I went home, I felt so much better.  So there you have it.  Mama's got a sad heart. But we will send him off with our love and best wishes, and pray for his safety every minute of every day!!!!!
Ducey doesn't know what to do with me.  He says, "Don't make me go outside Mom, it is 110 degrees out there, and I can't take off my coat!!!"
  We have been enjoying the heck out of the Olympics!!!!  Glued to it every night!!!  How about those American athletes!!!!    And ALL of the athletes!  So inspirational!  I love to hear the stories about the athletes and their families.  So many great stories behind their success.  My favorite event has been the beach volleyball!!  Way to go Misty and Carrie!  They are amazing!!!  But also as exciting, were the womens' soccer and water polo!  And I always love the diving!
That's all I've got.  My garden is on the last leg with this horrible heat.  My chickens aren't laying as many eggs.  I haven't cooked a meal in a month of Sundays!  I haven't worked on anything creative.  I am just a big bore lately.  Sorry folks.  Hopefully, as my Mom would say, "This too shall pass."
Over and out.  I'm going swimming before I have to pick Noah up.
XO  Kris

35 comments:

Holly said...

My Dear Sweet Friend, my heart sure goes out you. I have such a fear of my kids moving away and it will be so hard when they do. I'm so sorry your heart is hurting and wish I could wrap you up in a big ol hug. Keep us updated on his progress and I am so proud of him to make this very scary new step in his life. Love you!

Mereknits said...

Oh Kris, I so know how you feel. My son is moving across the world all the way to Ohio and I am so sad. I am happy for him but at the same time petrified, my gosh he can not even put the toilet seat down, how is he going to survive at school? I know we have raised them to leave and be on their own, but they are our babies and it physically hurts to feel them leaving. My heart goes out to you, even though you know he has to give this a try, even though he is ready, we aren't! My Mother always said they outgrow us before we outgrow them. So true. Sending you a special hug,
Meredith

Heather - The Good Life said...

Thinking of you Kris and wishing your son great success as he pursues his dream. Hugs, Heather

The Garden Bell - Kate said...

God Bless you for even posting. I mean....111....not fun. The pool is the only place for you to be. So sorry to hear about your son moving this way. Just think of all the fun you will have visiting him. Nashville is a cool town with lots to do. I'm thinking SouthWest...

I don't blame you for a sec. Not much cooking here either. Just going to chill for the weekend and work on setting up Scott new desk area. I'm finally getting him out of my hair in the office upstairs. Now he will be all set in the finished basement with the treadmill, bike and new desk area. Can I just get him to move out of the shared closet....

Splash a little for me.... Kate

Eileen said...

Hi Kris,
I can so relate how you are feeling now. Years ago when Jill and Jerry moved to North Carolina from Maryland, it was one of the hardest things to accept as a parent. Knowing they were miles and miles from family. But Jerry had to move for his job and Jill followed. During the next couple of years they moved a little closer, one time, just 15 mins. away. But now they are 3 hours away. We knew we had to let them go and start their life. Even if it meant not being close to family. I guess it is a part of growing up and making it in this world today.
When you watch them start with a clean slate and how that slate is filled with their accomplishments, you are a very proud parent. Good luck on his adventure and many blessings to him .
hugs, Eileen

Gloria said...

Oh dear you had a so hard week; your son; the hot weather and all we hsve to do always sigh!

Always Im worry by the kids (have 18) only we can pray!
About the weather. Hope soon arrive the fall; i love the fall:)
Hope you can have a nice weekend.xxx

Patty@Lemon Lane Cottage said...

Oh Kris, this momma understands your momma heart perfectly. It stinks when we raise them to follow their heart and then they do...right across the country. Thank goodness for cell phones and facebook.
He will be fine...you done raised him good. He has a good head on his shoulders and he will do great. He has to try. Hang in there. Now go dive off that diving board and let Noah score you! lol hugs dear friend, Patty

Elaine @ Sunny Simple Life said...

Oh Kris I know this has to be killing you. Well maybe he will be back but then maybe something great will happen you will be taking vacations to Nashville. My heart breaks for you. I keep waiting for my oldest to tell us she is moving away. She is so strong willed and wants to leave CA so badly. She wants a more rural life and less people plus she has decided all men (that she has met) in CA are pigs. See this part of parenting is so hard.

Debbie said...

Oh Kris I know you know that I know just how your mama's heart is feeling..I felt myself tearing up over here for you reading this...It is just soo hard to have them move away from our everyday lives. It has been 4 years for me since my Melly moved and I still struggle with it. But I can tell you from experience it does get better and better...It just becomes the "new normal." I understand how you feel too about wanting what is best for them, happy they are living their own life and dreams, and yet just knowing you will miss them, and worrying all will be fine. We raise them up to be totally independent if we have done our jobs well, but it is still hard to let go like this. So together we will put these kids in God's very capable hands and trust He will watch over and protect them always NO MATTER where they are. Drew is a talented guy and I look forward to seeing just what God has in mind for him!

This weather is just horrid! I REALLY miss our pool when it is this hot. We haven't quite reached those temps living where we are now, but it is still miserable. Lounge in that pool all you can and enjoy it for me. ; )

Big hugs!

Katie said...

Sorry to read about your sadness :( Sounds like your son is pretty amazing though and will certainly make you proud!! And at the very least, you have the MOST adorbs dog there to lick your face and snuggle in your lap. He reminds me a TON of Sam, a dog we had. He was a bischon/lhasa mix we think. What is Deuce?

Katie said...

Oh Kris, I'm sorry. This must be difficult for you, but very exciting for Drew! Just think of how fun it will be to visit him in Nashville!!
I'm going to a conference in Nashville in November, I will check in on him for you ;)

Nicolle said...

Sweet, dear friend! I cried when I was reading this. I was just so surprised to hear that your son is moving. I can imagine it is breaking your heart. I think what he is doing is wonderful and courageous, and I only wish I would have chased my dreams when I was younger. BUT, I totally get where you are coming from. As I've gotten to know you, I have seen how much you love your family, and how close you all are. I wish your son lots of luck, and I send you lots of hugs and prayers!

xoxo

~Niki~ said...

I sure understand your pain. He is your son! You love him and don't want him to go. You are also worried that he will have big hurdles. I think moms have the hardest jobs. I am not sure if I told you, but my 16 y.o. son in May decided he didn't like it at home and left me. He went to live with his father. I was hurt, still am. I love him but it is hard for me to accept. Don't know if i'll ever get over this. Maybe it will get easier, but never easy. sorry, my good friend, you are having to go throug this. know i'm here if you need/want to talk/vent, etc. :)

Lauri said...

It's a bitter sweet feeling, isn't it? We raise our children to be independent and make adult decisions and then they do. OUCH! Just think of how much fun and anticipation you will have when you make your first trip out to see him.

I feel your pain with the heat. It has been 116 degrees here all week and it is miserable not even the pool can cool me down. I think im melting!

Kerri said...

Oh Kris, my heart feels so heavy for you and your family. I always comment about how lucky you are to have your family all nearby...and I know how much it means to you. I guess that's one good thing about having an only child...if he decides to move away...we will follow him! (That's allowed, right?!) I think it's really brave of Drew to follow his dreams...and I bet it was hard for him to make that decision. So many ways to keep in touch these days...and I hear Nashville is a fun place to visit. I bet he won't be able to stay away long...you guys have the greatest family. Hugs my friend.

Susanne said...

Ahhh, Kris, I can understand where you are coming from on this one. It takes a lot of strength to let go and our children don't understand that until they become parents. My kids always told me that if everyone listened to what I had to say that no one would be having any fun. I guess I have been a wet blanket ever since they got big enough to be out of my sight. My youngest has always been a dare devil and it is no wonder I have a hair left on my head. She drove alone to New York City and ran a marathon and plans to do it again this fall. We never knew she was there till she posted a pic of herself in Central Park, then another with the Statue of Liberty in the back ground. I yelled at her dad, "Did Meghan tell you she was going to NYC?" Of course not! She has gone camping alone,
she has gone sky diving, she is a guard at a nuclear Power Plant and carries an M-16 plus other assault weapons. When she got that job I about flipped. Any wonder why I pray a lot...
(((HUGS))) Susanne :)

priscilla said...

Kris,
So sorry you are going through the sadness of your boy moving away. My oldest moved 6 hours away with a job transfer for 2 years and that was hard. I am so glad they are back in the area now.. Next Friday we drop the 18 year old off 6 hours from home for college and I can't even talk about it without crying ! This is a hard part of being a mom , I am sure your son will do great ! Be strong !
Giving you a big hug from Illinois !

Deb~in~Denver said...

Oh Kris, my heart aches for you. I know how hard it is to have your child move across the country. Shelby went to college in Iowa when she was just 17, I thought my heart was going to break. She blossomed there. When she told us she was moving Nashville after graduation, I cried buckets of tears. She came back home after 3 years and is now just 5 minutes away. I know you and Greg will miss Drew something terrible but maybe it's just time to share his wonderful talents with the rest of the world. It's obvious you have raised your family with lots of love, they will always come back home! Nashville is a beautiful place, you;ll have a great time going to visit with him!

Sending a big hug your way! ♥

Deb

Genn said...

Oh Mommy...

I'm sorry it's been rough. I think this could be a great thing for Drew. But as a mother I understand your heavy heart.

Love you. Xoxo

NanaNor's said...

Hi Kris, My heart is hurting for you my friend but I do have good news-you must go to Nashville often to visit! We had family that lived outside Nashville and we LOVE Tenn.-one of our favorite states. In fact, I wouldn't have minded living there. I know it means you don't see your boy all that time but girl, now you have a reason to jump a plane and go visit. O.k. I'm just trying to encourage you. I am glad you went to your friends house for a visit, wine and the pool. You are lucky to have a pool; we don't so I just stay inside.
Sending big hugs to you!!!!!
Noreen

NanaNor's said...

Hi Kris, My heart is hurting for you my friend but I do have good news-you must go to Nashville often to visit! We had family that lived outside Nashville and we LOVE Tenn.-one of our favorite states. In fact, I wouldn't have minded living there. I know it means you don't see your boy all that time but girl, now you have a reason to jump a plane and go visit. O.k. I'm just trying to encourage you. I am glad you went to your friends house for a visit, wine and the pool. You are lucky to have a pool; we don't so I just stay inside.
Sending big hugs to you!!!!!
Noreen

Mary said...

Yea. Olympics.. I just joined you and invited my sister, renae@simplesequins.com to come join you too. I found you through Pembrokeshire Lass. I think it's so cool to get those connections traced a bit. Your opening pic, looked so familiar..Is it Lake Tahoe? could be many places, huh? Happy summer...low chicken egg count, mine too.

Karen Bates said...

Such a sad time. I am sorry he has to move on but how brave of him, to take this chance that could change his life. You did good...you created this wonderful young man who is so strong (even with the desire to stay near family)...that feels an overwhelming desire to do you proud...to be the best he can be! What a wonderful statement about his roots! Right now that is not much solace but you can be so proud!

What! Laying around is a bummer? lol I know but the reason you are having this heat...is so you can be with your feelings and take a healthy break! Glad to see you are making the most of it...you deserve every minute of it! You go girl!

Diane said...

Kristy,
I hurt when you hurt.

You have raised Drew to be a bright, talented young man. He has to find his way by himself. But, he will be back..........to use the washer, computer, shop in your pantry, and eat,& eat,& eat.
Your home will always be his home.

I love you.......Mommy

Cozy Little House said...

Well, I'm sad for you. But happy that he has the courage to follow his dreams. If he didn't do it, he'd always have wondered. You know that. But it doesn't make it any easier.
Brenda

Cheryl said...

My heart is with you Kris. I know how important your family is to you, and our babies are always are babies. We just want them safe and everything to be good for them. Glad you got to hang out with some good friends...friends that love and support you. ((Hugs)) to you.

Jann Olson said...

Oh my sweet friend, we can cry together. My youngest daughter and her hubby just came for a 3 day visit. They are moving to Spain in Oct. Yes, I said Spain. They have decided that AZ was not quite right for them and they are going there to teach English and have one last big adventure before they decide to have kids. Talk about a heavy heart! The only thing good is that hubby has promised that we will go there sometime during the year that they will be there. Yes us moms worry, but we must put on a smiley face and let them pursue their own happiness. No matter how difficult it may be. e-mail me whenever you need someone to cry to. I will be praying for you and your son. I just showed my daughter your header and said, "Don't they remind you of us?". She said, "sure do"! Hugs, and I love your white board, too cute!
Jann

corners of my life said...

Your son sounds like a grounded young man ready to follow his dream and having a dream is half the battle.

Isn’t it true that our happiness is so tied to the well being of our children? I was so wrong when I thought the worrying would stop when they became adults. In many ways I worry more now.

Pat @ Mille Fiori Favoriti said...

Oh Kris, I know how hard this is for you to have your son moving away. My son went to Colorado for graduate school and fell in love with the state and decided to settle there for life. Then my daughter fell in love with the state on visits out to her brother and she moved there. I have been living here in NY without my kids for quite a while and miss them so much. To let you in on my secret my husband and I decided we are going to move there ourselves! I want to be closer to our grandchildren. Like you said, family is everything! I hope your son becomes a success and maybe will eventually move back to CA. In the meantime he is gloing on a wonderful adventure and will learn so much about the music industy. Youth is for dreams and making them come true. {{hugs}}

Erika Diane said...

All this time I keep thinking, let him fly, spread his wings. But reading it just now from a mothers point of view got me all choked up. I would be a mess if Noah left the same town as me let alone state. :(
XO

Sarah said...

My heart goes out to you during this major transition. It will eat me alive if/when my boys move away. HUGS!!!

Grayseasailor said...

First kindergarten and then Nashville...I am sending you hugs of encouragement, Kris as you enter into another season of your family's life.
With my two sons on the East coast and my daughters and me on the West coast, I can appreciate how difficult your son's move must be for you.
I am asking God to bless you and yours.
Gracie xxx

Jill said...

As the saying goes the two best things we can give our children is roots and wings. Your love will carry him far and sometimes the unplanned moments in life are the best moments. :-) sending you big hugs.

Blessings,
Jill

Debbiedoo's said...

I wish your son all the best life has to offer with his musical gift. My older boy being in the Marching band has been the greatest experience for him. He too loves music but says NOW, he does not want it to be his major. Although, I do believe it will always be a wonderful part of his life somehow. I think this is exciting for your son. He does have courage, which tells me you raised a fine, confident young Man.

annielizabeth said...

I understand your pain and sadness. Like when my daughter left for TX last summer. Recently divorced, no children, not much money and she takes off, yikes. But she's doing well and loves it there. I've yet to visit her in Austin but she came to CA for work in March and then by the grace of God,(coincidentally) she was in Minneapolis for work the same time Mom and I were visiting there. We had so much fun. Miss her. Hugs to you!